Forty & Fatuous!

40necklace

Bossy jewelry = best jewelry

Against all odds, I managed to survive the first 40 years of life, like some kind of walking girl power anthem circa 1978. In the days leading up to my birthday, I realized I haven’t done much with this life – in terms of what I wanted to accomplish, anyway – besides holding on with both eyes closed and hoping for the best. I’ve been more talk, less walk – but I want to change that.

So I ordered a custom-stamped necklace (pictured) from my friend Tiffany at Geisha Creations. I wanted a visual call to action, something to keep my eyes open; a reminder of what 40-year old me wants out of life that 39-year old me was too afraid or lazy to attempt. Sure, I balked at how cliché it all was: Turn 40, freak out, stare critically at self in mirror, give up, marathon Game of Thrones, then make list of things I should’ve done when I was 22. Still, it’s better than no list at all, or being dead, or listening to One Direction.

I don’t know what the next 40 years will be like, but hopefully this bucket list will keep me busy for at least the next year.

thisis40

40th birthday brunch on Alki Beach

#ThisIs40 Bucket List:

-Acquire three dragons through trial by fire and an army of slaves/horse enthusiasts.

-Learn to throw lightning bolts like some kind of white­-privileged, hammer­-wielding god.

-Purchase an Invisibility Cloak for those days I don’t want to be seen, which lately has been every day that has the word ‘day’ in it.

-Slay a Minotaur or, alternately, become one. Terrorize whole cities.

-Give birth to a shadow monster in a cave for political reasons.

-Fulfill burlesque dream of performing in a giant champagne glass filled with soy sauce and potstickers.

-Turn my closet into Princess Mombi’s closet using the KonMari Method.

-Jump from a helicopter onto a moving train onto a penny-farthing.

-Wear the Sovereign’s Imperial robe and royal crown to my next Pap smear; bring the Archbishop of Canterbury to make the process more austere.

-Train a pack of Direwolves to mush as new main mode of transportation.

-Get certified and start throwing shade at the competitive level. Throw it far and wide.

-Learn to braid hair so I look like a shield maiden who permanently lives at Coachella.

-Write television series modeled after Muppet Babies starring the Game of Thrones White Walker winter-babies. Hilarity and deadly shenanigans will follow.

-Double my cheese intake.

-Make more lists.

 

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2 thoughts on “Forty & Fatuous!

  1. What about getting resurrected by the Lord of Light?

    Like

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